New York, I Love You

You are a true New Yorker , if…

you prefer to do all your shopping on a Sunday or after 8 pm,

you’re willing to wait in line for more than an hour for a good burger,

you own more flats than high heels,

you walk so fast you could easily defeat a gold medal race walker even when you’re not in a hurry,

you don’t look up when some crazy person is making a scene,

you rent storage room for your winter clothes,

you can’t do your laundry without bringing some quarters,

you only go up or down with public transportation,

you consider the city park to be your backyard,

you forgot how to drive a car,

you keep checking if the subway/train approaches the station even if you’ve only been waiting for a minute,

you only shop at stores that deliver,

you only wake up if there is a fire in your building,

you avoid going to Times Square at all costs,

you avoid going to New Jersey at all costs,

you only buy organic food but don’t recycle,

you know that Mr. Duane Reade does not exist,

you’re impatiently waiting on the street instead of the pavement for the light to turn green when crossing an avenue,

you don’t wait at all for the light to turn green when crossing a street,

you believe air-conditioning is a human right,

you have a cream cheese bagel for breakfast,

you experienced a close encounter with a rat,

you would commit murder for an affordable downtown convertible 2BR apartment with exposed brick and hardwood floors,

you don’t complain when paying 5 bucks for a pizza slice,

you expect there to be a Starbucks every 2 corners,

you only consider it to be a holiday when there is a parade,

you crave for some Italian-Indian fusion food in a Mexican-themed restaurant with Russian waiters,

you expect to find everything within a half mile radius of your apartment,

you have hand sanitizer in your purse (or man-bag),

you don’t sing Frank Sinatra’s “New York, New York” every time you see the Empire State Building,

you have killed at least 10 cockroaches,

you own a sleeping bag coat and huge moonboots although you never go skiing,

50% of your clothes originate from sample sales, warehouse sales or discount stores,

you’re not embarrassed to go sunbathing in a public park,

you don’t go “ooh” or “aah” when taking an elevator up more than 40 flights,

you don’t take a picture of every squirrel you see in the park,

you expect to be able to hail a cab 24/7,

you can order a customized “mixed salad with extra tomatoes, cucumber, bread crumbs, american cheese, olive oil, vinegar, pepper and salt, pepper flakes and a roll on the side” within 3 seconds without breathing once,

you tip by doubling the tax,

you only leave the city to visit family or go on holidays,

you don’t need a map to go to Macy’s,

you can vacuum your apartment by using only one plug,

you think Belgium is a quiet quaint little village somewhere in Europe where beer and chocolate grows on trees. :-)